Quitting Time

I was cleaning out e-mails today (one of many arrows in my procrastination quiver) and I found an e-mail to my friend Lola at the beginning of my second semester at Queen’s:

"I’m 95% sure I’m going to throw in the towel this week. In shorthand: I’m interested in how business can be made to play a meaningful role in protecting human rights, particularly in the developing world. I’m not interested in U.N. bureaucracies, treaty law, piercing the corporate veil, legal origin theories, case law on the principal-agency relationship, theories re. what is a human right, the evolution of common law — you get the picture. I have six papers totalling something like 14,000 words due by mid January (with outlines due next week on three) and I have close to zero interest in the topics I’ve been assigned.

"The problem I had as a journalist persists—I’m more comfortable with the surface of things than with doing the tedious, disciplined work of understanding the boring intricacies of how things work. In my defence, I don’t have a law background and I jumped in at the deep end by choosing a master of laws at Queen’s."

I’m glad I stuck it out. I do have a better understanding of how political and business leaders and diplomats create the illusion of progress on business and human rights, yet atrocities and human degradation continue to underlie our way of living. I didn’t gain specialised knowledge in any one field--it was more a survey of the relationship between business and human rights. As with every degree, the real knowledge will come from whatever experience I can gain in the real world.

With Preventable Surprises, I think I’m learning more than I realise. I’m finding it tough because I’m by myself most of the time--Raj travels constantly and Carolyn is immersed in her own project. And they’re in London and I’m in Belfast. So being part-time and unsupervised, I’m having a hard time creating momentum and figuring out what I should do. However, rather than whinging that I feel like I’m drifting, I need to remind myself that it’s a luxury to not have someone telling me what to do and I need to take advantage of it and create work that interests and challenges me.

This week I’m trying to redesign our website, which challenges me more than it interests me...
10-18