How to get rich quick
Make it easy for big companies to outsource the provision of paranoia protection.
Remember my post about doing a urine test to prove I’m drug-free to an American financial company, for whom I write quarterly performance summaries? I’m a lowly writer working for a friend who formed a company that lets said financial company, let’s call it T.Rowe Price, outsource the high volume of quarter-end writing needs.
Well writing isn’t all that gets outsourced. Quest made a nice packet off of testing all the freelance writers. Another organisation scheduled all the tests for the writers. And then I get an e-mail from another organisation that manages documentation for T.Rowe. I had to print, sign, scan, and e-mail the following documents:
Notification of Securities Accounts Acknowledgement
Attestation of Contingent Worker Status and Benefits Waiver
T.Rowe Price Securities Account Disclosure
T.Rowe Price Code of Ethics and Conduct
Equal Employment Opportunity Policy
T.Rowe Price Policy Against Harassment and Discrimination
T.Rowe Price Contingent Worker On-Boarding Checklist
Of course I avoided doing this until I was getting ready to catch a flight to London, when the documentation deadline was looming. I got all the documents ready and David scanned and e-mailed them for me. I returned from London to an e-mail from another third party telling me I had to register on their website, provide all my addresses, past and present; all names I’ve been known by; and my SSN. This was so they could do a criminal check and driving record check. What on earth is going on in America?
You have to wonder what terrible thing happened at TRP, or elsewhere, that made them think someone who works about 60 hours a year (that’s right, 15 hours per quarter) for them poses such a monumental threat. I’m appalled at all the information I have to give to these companies--third-party vendors I know nothing about. I would walk away from the commitment but for the fact that it helps me maintain an earnings history for Social Security. I’ve reached that age where I think about what that monthly check will look like.
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